Knockers Vs Penshurst

Lose :: Played on Sunday 30th June 2024

Knockers
207-6

Penshurst
212-1

Match Report

Knockers assembled on an overcast Sunday at Penshurst, with thoughts more on the football and format than on what they’d given up their Sundays to do. Captain Young, surprisingly, had agreed to a slightly reduced game, 10-more than what some had hoped for but after winning the toss and batting the stage was set for a 30-over game.

Seldon and JT opened up. KCC were 45-0 after four-overs, with JT contributing 4 before he fell bowled to a good ball that nipped back in and clipped the top of leg-stump. JT was apparently so fuming that he decided to run to Tonbridge and back to blow off some steam. Seldon plundered boundary after boundary on his way 101, despite ‘not feeling great’ at the crease. The skipper was less than impressed as the KCC faithful decided to not applaud or even acknowledge his 50 after a Grandma was offended that Snellers took a liking to her Grandson’s bowling.

Jay was steadily accumulating at the other end despite nursing a hangover after celebrating India’s World Cup victory. Snellers edged towards his 100, but was given LBW (correctly) by Jai. With everyone thinking he was on 99 hearts were broken. A swift Trump-esque recount ensued and Snellers had indeed scored another Knockers hundred. Probably the first time he hasn’t been applauded at either milestone. Sorry Paul, I (FY) will make it up to you x.

Johnners and Jay ticked along nicely, with JJ scoring a new best score, reaching the lofty heights of 6. His cousin came and went, scoring the same, ensuring he would finish the season with a batting average. The skipper was extremely impressed with Ayush’s running between the wickets, as he complimented Stevo’s pinch hitting capabilities. Darren dropped two bombs with aplomb and an elegant, arousing, beauty. Perhaps a sign of things to come for Stevo’s contribution to the game?

Knockers finished 207-6 and tea was enjoyed by all, with the captain offering his opinion on infidelity and moral compasses.

Rups took the new ball, but only lasted two-overs as the opening batter took a liking to his bowling. He would not be the last Knocker to suffer such a fate. Horner bowled six on the trot, much to the delight of the Horner Knockers Fan Club, at the other end as Knockers went searching for a wicket. Young replaced Rups, and bowled three good overs, but it wasn’t enough.

The crowd wanted excitement. Stevo would not disappoint. Three overs, 18-balls, were bowled by dad-bod Stevo. One two. One three. Two twos. Two dots. Four singles. Eight fours. A tough day at the office for the best rig in the club, but his cheerful demeanour and odd obsession with Janet Jackson spurred the lads on. We love you Stevo. Never change (maybe fewer full bungers).

Ayush bowled two overs of darts after a good stint boundary riding. Drinks came and went, including a motivational team talk from the captain. It seemed to do the trick as Vini Jr. Blue Pill Spin Dr. Shah picked up the wicket in his first over caught by Young in the deep. Johnners bowled at the other end and Knockers seem to have found their go to bowling partnership for tricky situations. Johnners deceives batters with his variations, while Vinnie deceives them with his flight. A match made in heaven.

The vibes were up but alas the order was too tall for Knockers. A defeat by nine-wickets, as Knockers came out second best in the Battle of the Openers. When we are under the cosh, remember the post-drinks vibes. When we are on top, enjoy it, and remember how tough the first 10/15 overs were today. ‘Life is full of ups and downs. The trick is to enjoy the highs and have courage during the downs.’ We move onward and upwards to Old Oaks on Friday evening.

Player of the Match - Paul Seldon
Moment of the Match - Vinnie’s wicket
Stat Pack: 0 Tinder dates turned up, 0 milestones applauded, 1 ‘celebrity’ appearance, 3 Snellers sixes, 10.33 average bowler economy rate, 13 Snellers fours, 21 overs fielded by JT, with a Bluetooth earpiece in listening to the football, 49 dot balls

 

Batting

Batsman	How Out	4s	6s	Runs
Paul Seldon	lbw	13	2	101
James Thompson	bowled	0	0	4
Jayatheerth Seetharaman	caught	5	0	36
James Johnstone	caught	0	0	6
Ayush Singh	not out	1	0	15
Freddie Young	caught	0	0	6
Luke Stevens	caught	2	2	23
Seb Horner	not out	0	0	2
Rupesh Vara	dnb	0	0	0
Vinit Shah	dnb	0	0	0

 

Bowling

Bowler	Overs	Mdns	Runs	Wkts
Rupesh Vara	2.0	0	35	0
Seb Horner	6.0	0	39	0
Freddie Young	3.0	0	13	0
Luke Stevens	3.0	0	45	0
Ayush Singh	2.0	0	22	0
Vinit Shah	3.0	0	30	1
James Johnstone	2.5	0	27	0