Winning Draw :: Played on Sunday 30th July 2000
To be surprised on a Sunday morning is not the best of things, especially for the Knockers after an inevitably heavy Saturday night. But this Sunday was to be one of those days. The particularly average match managing of O. Boreham left everyone in the dark about the game until the last minute and a surprise change of start time for the game caught everyone on the hop. This ended in everyone arriving subdued and mostly hung over - one member didn't even manage to make it( a car crash being the reason) but only for the incompetence of Oli Boreham was there enough players inviting 13 along including Trouncey to Umpire.
A hot summers day was the sight that greeted the opening eyes of the Knockers throughout the batting session. Boreham managed to win the toss and elected to bat much to the delight of all those who still hadn't quite realise how they got to the match let alone to home the night before.
As if by magic Borehams batting matched his match preparation skills and was about as scratchy as can be. Needless to say he was soon out to be replaced by L Sp-Allen who played the opener for some pleasing pulls before succumbing to the temptation of their first change slow bowler for 12. S. Seldon was out prior to this LBW to what he thought was a controversial decision. Enter P Seldon, who amongst a backdrop of extreme laziness sauntered his way to the seemingly dizzy heights of 73, the second highest score for Kockers this season. He was ably assisted by E. Irwin whose increasingly dependent scores have lead him to predict big things against Tonbridge - his first ever 50 fro the Knockers could be on its way - all I say is good luck Ed! Playing some extravagant shots in the mist of some sensible and clever strokes he calmed the tide and set up the Knockers for a sensible session of batting. He was to be replaced by Martin Thomas who in a clash of styles with the ever increasingly slow batting of P Seldon (his running anyway) smashed around 40 runs in next to no time acquiring 4 sixes, alleviating the ground of the stress of the ball by releasing it into the sky and over the boundary. He certainly punished the ball in preparation for his climax at some point this season until being bowled. Jariwalla provided the entertainment for 10 minutes whilst in the process of one of the most awful displays of batting, to avoid being stumped made his way back to his ground, fell over and relinquished his injury of past in his knee and fell to the ground. He retired hurt but without informing anyone and the rest of the teams were unsure of whether he was stumped or hurt as he quickly threw his gloves to the ground after his dramatic fall. The sympathy for him was diminished when it was found on camera the evidence of him swapping his bat with Martin on the field. this was to be fined later. Low order stints from G Miller, C. Sp-Allen and B Rumary were all to add to the Knockers final score of 217-8 dec.
After a hearty tea, the Knockers made to the field. The ginger ninja assumed his place as keeper for the day as the ever unreliable Boreham had to leave early to work, shunning his responsibilities of captain for the day. C Sp-Allen and L Sp-Allen opened the proceedings with a mixture of fast and accurate bowling which was to give the opening pair some challenges early on. Lynden took a wicket in the 4th over, but the 2nd wicket partnership was to prove critical to Linton Park as their other opener scored a hundred before late in the innings the unlikely Oli Boreham made the breakthrough which was to save the match for the Knockers. The intermediate bowlers proved unsuccessful and athough not overly expensive helped the opposition to a challenging position on the Knockers score. Rumary started well but lost his way slightly in his over of variation. The batsman was unsure of what was coming next - Ben possibly to the same extent too! Darry, Jariwalla and Miller also bowled without breakthrough as the partnership grew. The game became tense as they grew closer to the target. With 17 overs to go L Sp-Allen was brought on again having had a 6 over rest from one end whilst Darry bowled and Irwin from the other end. They succeeded in stemming the runs and taking a few wickets leaving Linton Park with a hard task to beat the score posted by Knockers. It was all looking to develop into a draw when Irwin's penultimate over relaxed the pressure and eased the opposition into an elevated position. The last two overs were to be critical to the game after all. With only 10 fielders after Boreham had been sent home for being so rubbish (well work anyway) Lynden took a wicket and stemmed the flow of runs which Ed matched in the last over to leave the game just two runs away from a Linton Park victory but out of the realms of loss for the Knockers.
The game was certainly not a quiet one. With Thomas behind the stumps becoming increasingly wound up by various comments throughout the session - mostly form Eddie, the complete idleness of P Seldon, Darry's language and general banter from everyone else the game was always a heated one. Martin's hyperactivity was evident when in the pub after the game he offered the challenge of an arm wrestle which soon he won easily, only to prove that he is easily the strongest (try and moan about that then Martin!) After last weeks disappointing display of batting it was good to see most people chipping in but some of the field remains slack and the concentration midway through the fielding session should be improved to maintain a consistency in the Knockers game.
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